Month: September 2017

Goodbye

Come with me and rest in my arms,
Let me guide you, let me take you.
You’re in safe hands, I won’t let go,
No need to fret, just relax for a while.
I’ll keep you safe as I always have.

The end of the road is close at hand,
But fear not as I am taking you on a journey.
Let me take you to the rainbow base,
So you can scamper into a pain-free land.
I’ll keep you safe as I always have.

One last meal, so let’s make it good,
Fast food burgers with all the trimmings,
Your sister gets one, but the chocolates just for you
Take your time and enjoy the tastes.
I’ll keep you safe as I always have.

Sit a while and watch the sea flow,
My loving dog with little time to go.
Come with me for our last walk together,
We can take our time, that’s how you go.
I’ll keep you safe as I always have.

It’s time to go, so come with me,
One last car ride my beautiful girl.
Sit on the passenger seat next to me,
I’ll take my time and talk a while.
I’ll keep you safe as I always have.

We walk on in and the sadness builds,
I hide it now so you’re not scared.
The lady nods with a knowing smile,
It’s time my friend, the end is nigh.
I’ll keep you safe as I always have.

We settle down, all four of us,
Me, you, your sister and your other Dad.
The lady leaves to give us space,
We hug and kiss you for one last time.
I’ll keep you safe as I always have.

The moments come, a last goodbye,
All we can do is sit and cry.
The rainbow waits to take to far,
Away from us to a doggies land.
I’ll keep you safe as I always have.

Now your gone and free from pain,
An empty void begins to rein.
The picture we have will not bring you back,
Or your empty bed, or your toy sack.
I’ll keep you safe as I always have.

The memories we shared,
with the love that you gave,
Will help us through this difficult stage.
The pain will fade as the memories grow,
So keep us safe as you always do.

Goodbye, My Sweet Girl Lilu

Yesterday M and I said our final goodbye to Lilu.  My little girl was close to 17 years old and had finally grown tired of her life.

                           Lilu In the RSPCA

                     Lilu’s First Day Home

Back in 2003, we adopted her from the RSPC. She had been abandoned in south Liverpool and had gone from centre to centre and for some reason no one wanted her. Unknown to us she was in the last shelter as they were going to put her to sleep if no one adopted her. We found this out a few months after adopting her. She had arrived at the shelter and the next day we happened to go in and see her. She looked sad and thin and peered through the bars of the pen at us. It was instant love at first sight. We asked to see her, and knowing she was very timid, I sat on the floor at her level talking quietly to her. She came over to see who I was and looked me directly in the eyes, then stepping forward put her feet on my shoulder, never looking away, then licked the face off me. This to me was her adopting us and not the other way round. We brought her home and she instantly made it her home. I admit we did have difficult times with her due to her having abandonment issues, but we worked through it and in the end, she settled down and stopped being destructive. I have always had dogs in my life from when I was a toddler so knew that it would work out and what to expect. Even when she tore up two hall carpets and literally ate through a sofa, we carried on because we expected it.

 Lilu in Hydrotherapy

In 2010, whilst out on a walk she stumbled and fell on the field whilst running after her ball. A small yelp and she did not get up again. I ran over to her to find she could not get up and her back end was paralysed. We called the vets office which was closed but had emergency services and they took one look and referred us to the Animal Hospital 46 miles away. When we got there the vet team took her in and made her comfortable and would do MRI scans, X-rays and more the next morning as by this time it was late. We went home expecting the worse and hoping for the best. She was in hospital for about 5 weeks and each night after work I would drive home, collect M and drive to the hospital so we could see her, and on the weekends we would go in the morning and visit her for an hour or two, then go get lunch, visit her again, leave and have dinner, and go back to see her until it was late and we then went home, only to do it all again the next day. Eventually, she made a recovery and came home, but two or three times a week we would be back at the hospital for her to have laser treatment, infrared treatment, and hydrotherapy. This along with the exercises done by both us and the hospital enabled her to walk unaided again, although she would never walk properly.

2017 Lilu started to slow down, and although the vet said that she has life left in her she did have problems. Her heart was slowing down, her lungs scarred and she had a slightly underactive thyroid. She was given medication and seemed to respond well to the steroid for her lungs, and her cough seemed to go. However, after some time we were told to reduce the steroids so we could get a balance that was right for her, alas, her cough came back again and never went. The thyroid tablets did not agree with her and rather than give her more energy, she started to sleep all the time. In the end, we stopped the thyroid tablets and she picked up again, but her cough was still there, and she had bouts of vomiting and loose bowel movements. Again, we dealt with it as she seemed to eat well and was generally upbeat. Then she started to slow again, and the vet suggested we prepare ourselves as they could prescribe all kinds of medication, but to what end? Quality of life to us was far more important than quantity of life.

If you have been following my blog, then you will know that we had to go to Ireland, this was to see M’s mum, as she is in a nursing home, and he had not seen her for 18 months. We got back after being away for 5 days and Lilu was her usual self, however, the next day (Tuesday) her muzzle was red, she developed a temperature and had terrible diarrhoea. I booked the vet for the next day, this was yesterday. She had slept a lot of the day, would not eat or drink and just looked very tired.

The vet looked at her and said that she could keep her in, put her on a drip, give antibiotics and see if she would improve, but we knew deep down that the time had come. I asked her what her honest professional advice would be as we only wanted a quality of life for Lilu. The vet said it would only be a few days and we would be back again, and in the meantime, she could get worse. Her temperature was 2 degrees above normal, and the vet thought that she may have an infection that was running throughout her body and without invasive investigation they could not be certain. Either way, our hands were tied.

6:30pm Lilu had a line inserted into her front left leg and we sat with her, stroking and talking to her. She had been given a sedative, so was very calm. All the time she kept giving us “kisses” and just after 6:40pm, the vet started the procedure. My heart broke and the tears flowed down my face, all the time stroking her, keeping eye contact, more “kisses”, then she lay her head down and fell asleep.

My heart is broken, and dare I say will be for a long time. Her bed, bowls and other bits will stay where they are until we are ready to put them away. Her collar is in her memory box along with all her documents, and other collars she had through the years. Her name tag and contact barrel are on the wall next to my computer, so whenever I am sat here I can see them and imagine here curled up at my feet.

This is the last photo I have of her taken jin Liverpool on 5th August. We had just been for a walk along the dock front. She was tired, as mentioned her mobility was not all that good, but she always had a go. Coming back to the car she slowed right down. She had dragged one of her back paws and it had bled, so she was getting lots of deserved attention and fussing which always made her happy.

I will miss the smelly farts, getting woken in the middle of the night so she could go for a pee. I will miss that she was deaf and when she yawned she made funny yowl noises. Her constant want to sit on the sofa with us, then getting of minutes later only to want to be lifted up again to sit with us. Her playing with her teddy bears and stripping their stuffing out all over the house, her last one given to her only on Monday which she walked about with it in her mouth, just chewing on it softly. But most of all I will miss her unquestionable love, her cuddles and kisses, and that beautiful face that has been in our lives for 14 years.

Our dogs have always come with us wherever we go, from shopping to holidays. The only exception was Christmas 2009, and when we went to Rome, Amsterdam and last week in Ireland. We have decided to have her cremated, and her ashes put in a wooden box that will come with us whenever we go on days out and when we holiday in the UK. She loved to go out in the car on days out and to new places, especially on holiday.

I love you little girl and will miss you until the day we are reunited again.

Premium Theme

I keep looking at my blog, and although I like the look and layout, especially my sheep, I love my sheep, but, I keep thinking that I need to change the theme to make it more, well, more me. The little devil’s voice keeps putting temptation in my way, and I am a sucker for temptation. But as with all things, one has to think these things through, oh, and the cost that comes with it.

Aquarium…

After our jaunt to unexotic lands, I found on our return that I had lost a few fish, one of my reedfish, a rainbow shark, an oranda and two mollys. Needless to say, I was not happy at all, these things are not cheap to buy and the oranda I had had for years. I tested the water and there were no problems apart from quite a bit water evaporation in the sump.

With a heavy heart and a flush of the toilet, they all went to the watery heaven and I took myself off to the aquatic shop to get more fish. I bought a male Siamese fighter, two silver dollars, two shrimps, and two gouramis.

The silver lining to the very ugly death cloud was one of the fish had given birth and there are a few baby fish hiding around the tank, and one managed to make its way through the filter grill into the weir, then took a ride down the pipes into the sump. I thought of moving him to the main tank but decided that he can stay there as he would have a better chance of survival as one of the others would probably eat him. So with the birth of the fish, I can rest assured that the tank levels must be okay.

Photos to follow later.

Zombie Apocalypse…

I always wondered what it would be like when the eventual and inevitable Zombie Apocalypse hit. I am sure you all understand where I am coming from, and may have thought about it too. You know, the day when everything stops, life changes, and not necessarily for the good.

Thursday 21st September 10:28am

Whilst in a store just queued up ready to pay for winter coats, sweatshirts and some tee shirts the store lights went out. M and I looked at each other, I raised my eyebrows and said “uh oh!”, M nodded slowly in agreement. My first thought as I realised everything electrical was dead was “This is it, this is the end, this is the Zombie Apocalypse”.  After a few minutes of all standing about a worried looking male worker came rushing over to everyone and announced that we all had to evacuate the store.

I turned around and realised that we were sort of stuck as M is disabled, he cannot use the stairs, and the escalators and elevators were obviously not working.

I told M to call his brother and see if the power was out where he lived. He called, and he relayed that indeed the power was out there too, but he wasn’t at home, but miles further away again. The atmosphere was eerie and other people milling about were reporting to the group that everyone they called confirmed the same. I checked social media to see if a zombie apocalypse was happening or the Korean nutter Kim and gone to war with the other nut job Trump, so far, nothing was being reported, but no useful information was coming through either.

After about 15 minutes, we decided to take our chances. I drove through the town looking about, and indeed near everywhere was in darkness apart from the banks who have backup generators. The streets seemed to be lined with people on their phones looking for information or calling people, and I suggested again to M and his Dad of my zombie apocalypse theory as we headed away.

It was a very strange moment in time, and although the zombies were not to be seen, and after a few hours life in the town returned to normal and power was restored, I wondered if other people thought the same as me and if this really was the end, what would we have done. I know one thing though, I would have wanted to be back in my own country with M and the dogs, oh, and a full store of canned goods and bottled water.

Homeward Bound

Homeward bound finally. M and I are now in our cabin, lying on our beds (of which we have 4 to pick from) relaxing and eating overpriced chocolates after our lunch.

We have been travelling for 7.5 hours so far, and have another 6 hours to go until we dock back home, then just over an hour drive home.  I admit, I will be happy to get back to my own house and relax properly, although I am very relaxed here, and the hum of the engine is quite the sleep inducer.  The facilities are good, comfortable beds, our en-suite shower is great but a little cramped.

I cannot decide whether to watch a film on TV, go to the cinema, or just lay about and read my Kindle and maybe have a nap.

Out At Sea

M and I are currently on the ship travelling to Ireland. We left the house at 6:30am, boarded the ship at 9am and set sail at 10:30. We have walked all the decks, used the two restaurants for tea and snack and I am eagerly awaiting our lunch at 1pm.

We got a standard cabin, as I was unaware that you could have a luxury suite, so next time I may go for an upgrade.

So far the sailing is smooth, but we are expecting a storm front to hit about 1pm, which will last until we leave the ship at 7pm tonight.  A long day, especially if it gets choppy, but I admit it, I quite like being at sea. Now don’t get me wrong, I love to fly, it is my preferred method of travel, but there is so much room, we have our own bathroom, and are not strapped into a tube of recycled air like cattle in a cart.

After lunch, we may have to visit the cinema and have a nap.  Knackered as my insomnia took over at about 3am.  That is, I am blaming my alertness on insomnia, but it may be guilt on leaving the dogs at the kennels yesterday. I say guilt, but we are sitting here as I am writing this talking about our planned trip to Rome next year and what we will be doing, so maybe not so guilty.

Sweater Update

I thought I would post an update on the chunky sweater I am making myself. I had to get a 120cm 8mm circular needle as the straight needles I have are just not long enough.

This is where I am with the front so far.

Drops Project

I won a £100 voucher on LoveKnitting.com back in April and decided that I would make myself a sweater for winter. I have lots of ones that I want to make but thought this Drops Admiral’s Braid would be my first one.

I cast on, then realised I was not sure what n edge stitch was, as I have never needed one, so a quick trot about the internet, and hey presto, I now which one of the many I need to use.

Then, starting the pattern rib I read M.1 as make one, as most people would, then when getting to the end of the repeats I was left with 19 stiches on my needle. I re-read the pattern and no, it seems wrong. I then thought that rather than the repeat from * to * 4 times (5 in total) I would remove one of the repeats and be left with 31 stitches.  Looking again at the pattern I noticed that there was a little chart M.1 with 31 stitches. BINGO! I sussed it out, so frogged the lot and am about to start again.

I keep telling myself to read the whole pattern before starting, but my advice seems to fall on my deaf ears, and of course, I screw things up again. Will I ever learn?

Stay tuned for updates.

 

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